“When your enemy’s making mistakes, don’t interrupt him.” —Billy Beane
As a die-hard sports fan, Moneyball was enjoyable on a slew of different levels, and this quote was my hands-down favorite. I’m a firm believer in the sentiment, but there are times—serious times—when you need to break this rule.
Thuuz: We’re worried about you.
We’ve told you before about the danger of relying solely on algorithms to calculate game excitement, and…
Wait, no, don’t leave! Please sit down, Thuuz. All of us came over today to talk to you. Just hear us out.
…
First off, we love you. I hope you know that. We were elated when you first got started—what better demonstration of a rising tide lifting all boats? You were brash, and noisy, and plucky, and everything else we love about young startups. The Kansas City Royals are the most exciting team to watch in baseball? Umm, sure! Why the heck not! You guys were so adorable!
I know it has been a while since we’ve hung out, but we’ve been keeping a keen eye on you. We remember how hard it was just making it to year two, and we’re proud of you for making it to that milestone. Nobody is perfect (RUWT?! definitely had its year two issues), but what we’ve been seeing lately makes us worry.
You completely ignored us when we confronted you about the UAB Blazers being the most exciting team in college football. You’re an adult, that’s your choice.
But Monday’s NBA game between the Grizzlies and Warriors getting a perfect score? Last week’s San Diego State Aztecs vs. New Mexico Lobos Mountain West Conference regular season game was MORE EXCITING than the unbelievably epic Game 6 of the World Series? Really?! Are you hearing yourself?!
Wait! I’m sorry I raised my voice. Please sit back down.
…
I got off track there, I’m sorry. The reason why we’re here today is because of the NFL. We saw your stats about the most exciting teams this season, and we’re…confused.
It’s mostly good—the Giants, Pats, and Lions are spot on. But the Panthers? The 13.06 average point differential Panthers are in your top 3? Okay, fine, Cam is pretty fun to watch.
But gosh, where are the Broncos? It doesn’t matter if you’re on Team Skip or on Team Steven A., if you don’t think “Tebow Time” was one of the most talked about and exciting storylines of the season, you’re not paying attention! Heck, even Thuuz employees are Tebowing!
We’ve been telling you from the start, algorithms are not enough. Just think, if you incorporated even the slightest bit of human interact…wait! Stop! Where are you going?!
…
Dangit. Sorry guys, I’m just no good at these interventions. I’ll call you when it’s time for the next one.
Most Exciting NFL Teams for 2011-2012 Regular Season, ranked by Are You Watching This?!
1. New York Giants (213.63)
2. Denver (208.72)
3. New England (203.94)
4. Dallas (193.81)
5. Green Bay (195.00)
6. Detroit (172.41)
7. New Orleans (183.50)
8. Pittsburgh (181.82)
9. Arizona (166.00)
10. San Francisco (173.17)
11. New York Jets (166.19)
12. Baltimore (169.67)
13. San Diego (159.63)
14. Minnesota (154.81)
15. Oakland (149.81)
16. Cincinnati (144.94)
17. Philadelphia (153.69)
18. Atlanta (147.53)
19. Kansas City (143.75)
20. Buffalo (143.31)
21. Chicago (146.00)
22. Washington (136.81)
23. Houston (131.39)
24. Indianapolis (130.75)
25. Cleveland (128.56)
26. Tennessee (130.88)
27. Miami (131.75)
28. Seattle (127.69)
29. Tampa Bay (124.31)
30. Carolina (123.75)
31. Jacksonville (123.00)
32. St. Louis (97.69)
Teams are ranked by average excitement rating minus one-quarter of the standard deviation.