Where’s my flying car?

And along with that, where’s my multi-million dollar payout?

The following post is in response to the Trash TechCrunch post on techcrunch.com…

Okay, it’s the 21st Century. As a child born in the 70s I was promised flying cars, hovering skateboards, and my own personal robot by now. So the scorecard 28 years in? Flying car? My Alma mater is pretty close. Hovering skateboard? Eh, my knees are bad. Personal Robot? Had to make my own. The list needed a 7 year grace period, but all in all, not a bad showing.

Okay, it’s April 2007. As a bootstrapped startup less than a year old, I was promised to have millions of dollars, my picture on the cover of magazines, and invited to speak at tons of conferences by now. So the score card after 7 months? Nada. Squadoosh. Even with a 30-day grace period, there is no reason why I shouldn’t have gotten my fat stacks of cash by now.

Sure, it takes Web 2.0 sites like Dodge•ball, Mee•boo, Face•book, Flick•r, Blog•lines, and Net•vibes a good year to get some duckets, but are•you•watch•ing•this is Web 5.0. A buyout should happen the day I leave alpha!

The one sliver of good news is that I plan to poetically sue the ambulance-chaser who is responsible for this travesty. That’s right, the blog you love to hate: TechCrunch. I freakin’ hand-wrapped my invitation to a life of geek groupies and an off-shore bank account, when I suggested they put “Digg” somewhere in the title of my review (cause people can’t get enough Digg-inspired sites), and they still somehow jacked this up. To keep this simple, let me lay out the facts for you:

1. I got a review on TechCrunch
2. I have not been bought out for millions of dollars

Do you see the discrepancy here?

This is an open and shut case.

I’m gonna sue his ass back to Web 1.0.